An All Female "Expendables"?

When I first heard that an all-female "The Expendables" project was being shopped around, I didn't pay much attention. It seemed like such a flimsy gimmick. We haven't had more than a couple of actresses who could rightly be called action stars. And if we were suddenly nostalgic about them, wouldn't it make more sense to put them in one of the actual "Expendables" sequels instead of corralling them off in their own film? Now that I think about it, I find I am a little miffed that no major female names found their way into "The Expendables II."

Well, now the news has come out that Gina Carano's gotten herself officially attached to this project, even though it has yet to land a script or director, so there's a greater chance of this one really happening. Mentally, I'm still trying to wrap my head around the idea, and thinking about potential lineups. The obvious names under consideration would include Sigourney Weaver, Linda Hamilton, and Uma Thurman. Then there's Michelle Yeoh, Cynthia Rothrock, and Pam Grier. Maybe Brigette Nielson, Grace Jones, and Kathleen Turner. A couple of former Bond girls are also possibilities. Current action stars Milla Jovovich and Kate Beckinsale, like Carano, seem too young to be nostalgic, but then "The Expendables" has Jason Statham in their roster, along with oddballs like Terry Crews and Randy Couture. However, including them wouldn't change the fact that if you were committed to following the template of "The Expendables," you would be trying to make an action film with a lot of actresses in their fifties and sixties.

You see the problem here? We've had plenty of movies about older male action stars getting together for one last job or one last mission, but there is no equivalent for the ladies. With very rare exceptions, you don't see a lot of older women running around with guns and swords trying to kill each other in the movies. Heck, the last really physical face-off between two older women I can think of was the sorceress duel between Patricia Hayes and Jean Marsh in "Willow." After a woman hits a certain age, they're put on the sidelines in action films. They're M. They're Pam Landry. They're somebody's mother. If they get into any kind of serious fight, it's often played for laughs. Older women can star in thrillers and crime dramas, which appeal to older audiences, but in a pure action film that's all about muscles and bullets and explosions? The young male demographic that goes to the "Expendables" movies might have a difficult time accepting this concept, even if you threw in a couple of younger, more typically attractive leads. Right now the older female action heroine simply doesn't exist, and I'm skeptical that the people behind this new project are ambitious enough to invent a new genre for it.

It's not that I think the idea is a bad one. I would love to see some of these actresses tearing up the screen again in any capacity. I loved it when Quentin Tarantino brought Pam Grier back for "Jackie Brown," and when Helen Mirren got to use the big guns in "RED." However, I just don't see a "female Expendables" happening without some major alterations to the formula the producers want to follow. That's probably why they cast Gina Carano first. My guess is that most of the headliners that are being courted for this project are going to be significantly younger than the cast of "The Expendables," and probably not strictly action stars either. The older women will probably be limited to cameos and they'll get someone with a little more prestige to play the villain. I wouldn't be surprised at all if this winds up being billed simply as an multiple-heroine action film and they ditch the "Expendables" connection entirely. Actually, I'm not convinced that all this referencing of "The Expendables" isn't just a marketing thing, and the filmmakers really have no intention of seeking out older actresses at all.

Anyway, focusing the spotlight on a female action team is already enough of a gimmick and enough of a challenge, considering the last major entry in this little sub-genre was Zack Snyder's unfortunate "Sucker Punch." I can't imagine this one could possibly turn out worse, especially with Gina Carano involved. Despite my mixed feelings on "Haywire," I like her and I'm all for more action films with women taking the lead. There are never enough of them. And there's no reason this couldn't be a perfectly decent ensemble film with the right people involved. So I'm choosing to remain optimistic, but there's no way this is going to be the all-female version of "The Expendables." For that you'd need a female Stallone, Schwarzenegger, and Willis, which we don't have.

If Hollywood really gets cracking, though, maybe that movie will be possible in, oh, thirty years or so.
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